After a 34-hour train-ride to Winnipeg and a further 20-hours on a Greyhound to Calgary, I’m scheduled to land in Cowtown about two days into Stampede Week. You’re probably asking why I wouldn’t just fly to Calgary and leave overland travel for Third World countries where that might be the only option, and you would have a point, but for now let’s just say that I’m looking forward to slow travel and plenty of free time to write about it.
Tickets to the rodeo finals sell out quickly so I made sure to get mine back in February when they first went on sale. Ever since then I’ve been receiving regular email updates from the Calgary Stampede. And if nothing else, they are thorough. I’m now well aware of which entertainers will be in town for the week (Reba, Shania Twain, Keith Urban, etc.), where to buy a Stetson on short notice, and thanks to yesterday’s release, how to gain 10 pounds in a week.
The latest update includes descriptions and colour photos of 32 artery-clogging snacks that will be available on the midway. What isn’t deep-fried is sure to be bacon-wrapped, and of course some items are both bacon-wrapped AND deep-fried. You know, low-fat items like pieces of “pork belly” (essentially just big hunks of fat) that are then wrapped in bacon, deep-fried and served on a stick. While it’s not an official offering, I’m sure it wouldn’t be too hard to find an ice cream vendor to dip it in chocolate and roll it in Skittles if you were feeling gaunt.
The deep-fried Cheezies (top right) have some appeal but I don’t think I’d need more than a handful to satisfy my curiosity. Something tells me they won’t be cheap and they won’t be sold by the handful.
I think I’ll pass on the deep-fried donut bacon cheeseburger too. However, I might have to try one of their healthy vegetarian offerings – like the scorpion pizza. Yep, they will apparently offer “seasoned” scorpions on cheese pizza. Because, vegetarian or not, who’d eat a plain old un-seasoned scorpion?